Monday April 25, 2011

I woke up this morning feeling so much peace after just spending a few hours with my little girl. I knew that I had to sit down and work through the obituary because Jeff needed it by one. So I got up at 6:30 a.m. and headed out the door to sit on the step and converse with my Heavenly Father. I think he got an ear full and I shed lots of tears but I needed him to know that this wasn't fair and that I wanted her back but for some reason I knew this was the plan....

So I went into the dining room and sat at the computer. I said a little prayer in my heart that my words would be perfect and would come from my heart... So This is what I came up with through many tears and a lot of peace:

Our sweet baby girl was called home to her Father in Heaven way to early on April 22, 2011. She was called home to touch the lives of thousands here on earth and be an example on the other side. He needed somebody that was feisty, unpredictable, loving, and perfect. Jayci’s last and best adventure is where her life on earth ended, swimming with the angels.

Jayci was born on December 1, 2009 to her eternal parents Layne and Krissy Darrington and big sister, best friend, and partner in crime, Ellie June. Jayci was full of life and always one step ahead of you. She had a perfect obsession and love for the water, where ever it was she was there also.

Jayci Lillian will never be forgotten and live on, in our hearts, forever.

Jayci Lillian is survived by her parents Layne and Krissy Darrington and big sister Ellie June Darrington. Her Grandparents Val and Teresa Darrington (Declo, Idaho), Gayla and Fred Hough (Orofino, Idaho), and Dana Lott (Kamiah, Idaho). Her Great-Great Grandparents Jay and Lillian Nielsen (Twin Falls, Idaho), Bob and June Tyler (Rupert, Idaho), and Glenn and LaDawn Clark (Buhl, Idaho). She is also survived by many Aunts and Uncles that loved her more than anything.

She will be greeted in heaven by Marcine Weeks, Great Grand Parents Leroy and Minnie Darrington, Demar Lott, and Robert Cotten with so many others right there beside them.

While writing the obituary it was so surreal! Who really thought that I would be writing about my baby girl. Aren't your kids supposed to bury their parents? Well, when Layne got up we thought we would sit down and finalize the program. We weren't quite sure who was going to give the "celebration of Jayci's life". I knew all along that it was going to have to be one of my friends that knew me and knew of my unconditional love and at the same time the frustrations of my little girl. It came down to two choices. The one, she knows who she is, can't even say hi to me right now with out crying so i didn't think she would be able to keep herself together which I totally understand. She had a love hate relationship with Jayci so she was a little close to the situation. So Robbie it was. I had her name in my mind the whole time. I wanted her to do it because it needed to be humorous because that is Jayci and at the same time it needed to be compassionate. So put it all together and you get Robbie. She is a very good friend to me and has also been through a similar experience through losing one of her own prematurely. When I suggested this to Layne he was a little hesitant but there was no one else. Not everyone knew my heart as a mother or knew how much my child was a feisty little thing... We wanted the funeral to be happy and uplifting. So we called her over and of course she was at a loss for words but said "Okay."

The talk we felt completely had to be Greg. There was no other person for the job. As much as we are grieving and going through things so are they... Not to mention he and Jayci now have a special connection. And I wanted everyone to hear the story from his perspective. So of course he was happy to talk. In fact, he said he had the feeling we were coming all day and would be honored to do it. While we were there we asked Eric if he would play a song. He is an amazing musician and since the accident had been practicing a song. After hearing him play it, I knew it was the perfect song. It is one of my favorite songs of all time. ("Come Thou Font of Every Blessing.")

Today was another one of those busy days. Thank goodness after everything happens there is always something to keep you busy and you never have time to sit and feel bad... Apparently the grieving happens after the funeral. I miss my little girl and definitely had my moments. Well, after I called Jeff and told him all of our decisions we had to go to the cemetery and look at available spaces. So we bought six plots right next to each other. We now have our own plot and will be buried right next to our daughter. Right when we were done with that we went to the flower shop and and had to pick out our flower arrangement for the casket and also get the boutinears. I knew Ellie would fill special if she had one too so I ordered her a wrist bouquet. It was super cute.

The rest of the day was spent visiting with family and friends and time alone together as a family!